BliXX mission is to help humans to expand and grow through sexuality and Tantra. With that purpose, we invite the world’s best teachers and facilitators to offer their best eCourses on our website.
Today we welcome Shashi Solluna with her courses “The Tantric Couple Webinar” and “From Trauma to Tantra” on our RESOURCES: Sex Positive Education section.
Shashi Solluna is one of the most experienced and amazing Tantra teachers in the world, a living legend. She’s ventured into workshops, retreats, festivals, authored books, starred in a film, and now pioneers www.livetantra.com.
Shashi’s Journey
Before getting into the field of sexuality, she studied Psychology in Oxford. Beginning her spiritual path with Buddhism and celibacy, she gained profound insights but also grew rigid, solemn, and detached. After a trip to Osho Ashram in India in 1999, she found herself judging “spiritual” woman on their beautiful dresses, make ups and earrings until she has realised that she had totally repressed her own femininity and her own humanity to become this spiritual woman who always wear white and feels better than everyone else.
Tantra invited her to come back down again, to be human and integrate meditation and spirituality with the human experience. To truly embrace relationships, sexuality, and love, she must confront her humanity, flaws, traumas, past, shames, and more. Tantra, to her, is the fusion of the higher Self and the smaller self, aiming not just for enlightenment but integration.
Sex Positive Education because…
Shashi has a big passion for working with the sexual shadow and specifically with sexual violence. At one stage of her career, she supported both female rape survivors and a man seeking assistance after committing rape. That shifted her perspective on things and discovered that trauma affects both sides of the duality, ‘victims and perpetrators’. Each person carries innocence yet faces a system devoid of sexual education and awareness, unable to support vulnerability.
More and more in our world, we are hearing about pedophilia, non-consensual violence, etc. and she experienced how Tantra can help deal with sexual shadow with simple tools like genital breathing which bring consciousness into the body. Tantra also offers tools to work around forgiveness and shadows and brings light into the darkest places. This will make a huge difference that she would love to see in the world.
More about her offerings
In line with managing our shadows and finding ways to heal one’s self through tantra, Shashi has provided us two online courses on our website called ‘Tantric Couple Webinar Bundle’ and ‘From Trauma to Tantra’.
The Tantric Couple Webinar
The Tantric Couple Webinar, is an online course built on collaboration with other amazing tantric couples who work and/or embody conscious sexuality, tantra and intimacy. For her, what makes a couple ‘tantric’ is the ability to bring consciousness into the relationship and choosing to go on the journey together, regardless of the span of time. The key thing is to use the couple’s connection, love and attraction for each other in order to grow into the highest potential together. Working as a ‘tantric couple’ is about creating a container that is safe to explore and own whatever is going to be there. This is different to conventional relating where there is a lot more blame and complaining and people are not taught to take responsibility for what comes up.
To a personal standpoint, Shashi and her partner uses all the tools as an active tantric couple and this makes the relationship interesting. To her, being in this type of relationship is exciting compared to her past non-tantric relationship in which they were both passive in the sense of they were falling in love and the relationship will continue until the passion was over.
They use tantra techniques to help to ‘feed’ a relationship, to make magic happen to keep creating experiences. One of the tools that they use is the ‘trigger tool’ which came pretty early in the relationship because when they met, she just had a traumatic relational experience. She continuously felt triggered by her partner simply because he is also a man, so she chose to heal this trauma rather than viewing him as a perpetrator or enemy. They executed the ‘Pushing Hands’ Technique, as explained in the webinar. Her trauma healed, fostering even deeper trust with her partner, laying the foundation for further shared experiences and growth.
On her retreats she teaches these trigger healing techniques before doing all other lovely tantric techniques, touches and massages because it is very common to have negative emotions raising up with all the touches and meditations that will happen during the tantric practice. She stresses the importance of gaining knowledge and tools to override automatic responses in conflicts, halting perpetual blame cycles. The tools assist couples in navigating past traumas, facilitating the journey towards genuine intimacy by addressing these layers together.
In this 17-hour webinar, all couples are welcome. What is important with Tantra and Tao is that they both work with dualism and the non-dual together. The term ‘non-binary’ falls short here as it implies a binary and non-binary existence, but these systems transcend such categorization. Embracing these practices doesn’t require a woman-man couple; acknowledge the duality of light and dark, masculine and feminine energy. Denying this fact would mean that this may not be the right path and eCourse for you.
From Trauma to Tantra
Lastly, Shashi discusses about her second offer, the eCourse titled ‘From Trauma to Tantra’. This eCourse offers ‘trauma-informed’ tantra for both Tantra enthusiasts encountering trauma and those seeking healing for known personal traumas. Individuals can do the healing themselves or as a couple. She starts recommending people with trauma interested on the course to have an on-call therapist on the side. If emotions become too overwhelming to handle alone or in a relationship, it’s important to reach out for support. This person’s role is to create a safe space for the individual to process their emotions fully and securely.
Trauma can hinder relationships or lead to a cycle of falling for abusers repeatedly, as she clarifies. She also talked around the reactions in which trauma can manifest itself in sexuality. These reactions include the FREEZE response, where the individual overwhelmed in lovemaking exhibits a freezing-like reaction. This reaction can be override and mistaken by surrender. Opt for the FIGHT response, asserting your autonomy by confidently stating ‘NO, get away from me now’ when necessary.. And lastly there’s DISASSOCIATION or leaving the body because it’s too traumatic and painful to stay in it. You might mistake this reaction for having a ‘spiritual experience.
Shashi emphasizes the importance of teaching men and women to differentiate between a surrendered lover and someone frozen or dissociated. Learning about embodiment and be present in the body is important; and feeling the absence of your partner and being able to call them back to their own body rather than continuing with the sexual experience it is key to go deeper into trauma healing.
When you hear “BliXX”, what comes to your mind?
In Tantra, we can enter one of the most beautiful states: Bliss. It heightens and becomes delicious when we hyper-sensitize everything we feel in the body.
What is the single thing that allows you to feel more BliXX?
Practices anchoring my consciousness in my body: meditations, rituals, namastè before love, conscious touch, or tantric methods.
Thank you be_love_d folks!
WATCH THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW HERE
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